It’s September 9th, and that means that it’s time for Sony’s original PlayStation to celebrate another birthday here in North America. If it were a human person and not an inanimate pile of plastic and silicon, it would be pretty jazzed about this particular anniversary.
Why’s that? Because it’s 18! That’s a big deal here, as it’s the age at which bunch of previously locked doors open for teens all over the country. It can’t drink just yet, but there’s plenty of other debauchery to be had. Here are five PS1 games featuring activities that it could now legally participate in without getting a stern talking-to.
It Can Gamble: Caesars Palace
Well, maybe. Different states have different age limits (many set the gambling age at 21), and even then it depends on what kind of gambling you’re doing; a state may let you play the lottery at 18 but keep you out of casinos until you’re 21. In any case, there’s no better gambling sim on PS1 than Caesar’s Palace. That’s not saying much, and the games contained within — such as blackjack and poker — are easily downloaded to your smartphone for a dollar or less, but look! It’s an officially licensed product! That counts for something, right?
It Can Buy Guns: Time Crisis
At 18, you’re legally free to buy a firearm — it’s in the Constitution and everything! What better way to celebrate than by popping in the home version of the original Time Crisis, complete with GunCon controller? The only real drawback is that you don’t get the same bitchin’ recoil on the gun as you do on the arcade version. Being an adult means learning that you can’t win them all.
It Can Vote: SimCity 2000
Voting and the democratic process at large aren’t really all that glamorous, but leave it to video games to make the most tedious tasks seem fun, and with SimCity 2000 you don’t even have to be elected to control the day-to-day lives of millions. Show [INSERT UNFAVORABLE POLITICIAN] what’s what and run a city with surgical precision. Or just let it all go to hell; you’re the boss here, big guy.
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